“Acceptance feels like a starting point, while resignation feels like a stopping point.”
– Barry MagiD
I still clearly remember the exact moment I “learned to crawl” in meditation. For months (or was it years, even?) I was like a frustrated baby who instinctively knew there was more to life than eyeballing the ceiling – but couldn’t quite work out how to roll.
As I sat down to meditate one evening after work, the thoughts were LOUD. Frantic. A day’s worth of conversations, tasks and problem-solving flooded in and my body went rigid with resistance.
Agitated and restless, I was crawling out of my skin. This is NOT what I was here for.
Then, out of nowhere, two words dropped into the swell.
A simple meditation phrase that acted like a life raft and saved me from drowning:
I. Accept.
That’s it. I Accept.
I accept the thoughts.
I accept the busyness.
I accept the agitation.
Like magic, my body softened, my heart rate slowed, and for the first time ever, I understood directly the point of non-striving.
It took some practice to get on board with the new mantra, and while I can’t profess that every meditation was like warm honey thereafter, what I do know is this: the attitude of acceptance has been a surprising gift in life that’s turned up when I’ve needed it the most (hello, lockdown!)
And while you might be thinking acceptance is for quitters, or losers, or the complacent; think of it like this:
“Acceptance is what has to happen before there can be any action.”
It doesn’t mean resignation. It is the starting point from which change can occur either through decisive action or, in the case of my turbulent meditation that day, letting go.
Here’s a guided meditation you can try, and perhaps like me, you, too, will experience first-hand why non-striving gets such a good rap.
P.S. You can also listen to it here on Insight Timer.
I Accept
– MEDITATION –
The meditation phrase guaranteed to soften the body and mellow the mind.
Today we’re going to practice letting go. Which, interestingly, is a practice of letting in. And letting be.
It sounds counter-intuitive, but stay with me. In time, you might start to see a shift in how you experience things. With a little more openness and ease.
RELAX INTO YOUR BODY
So start by setting yourself up in a relaxed and comfortable way. Any position is fine. If you’re laying down you might fall asleep… but don’t beat yourself up. Your body obviously needs it.
Have a quick check in with the breath and the body. Take a deep breath in… and let it go. Take it in… and let it go.
Locate any spots where you’re clenching or holding. And see if you can unravel them an inch or two.
As I guide you through this practice of letting go, all you’ll need to do is to follow along with my words. You probably won’t hear every one and that’s OK. The mind will be settling at its own pace.
If you like having a general focal point in meditation, you could also keep company with your breath, or an external sound.. like a clock ticking, or the touch of a body part like your hands or feet.
LET’S BEGIN
To let go means to let go of resistance. To let go of expectations… that this moment should be any different to how it is right now.
To accept what is arising with an intention of ease and generosity. Of friendliness towards ourselves and to others. To let things in, let them be, then let them go – when they’re ready to.
We can practice the skill of letting go by adopting a simple intention or phrase: I accept.
So follow along with me.
I accept this moment.
This moment that’s here.
I accept this body.
Every sensation. Every itch. Every ache. This body is mine, it’s unique to me. And I accept it.
I accept this state of mind.
I accept its busyness, its fatigue, its creativity. Its ranting state and its serene state. I accept all states.
I accept this breath.
This in-breath and this out-breath.
This breath that nourishes and sustains me. That gives me life.
I accept this beautiful breath.
I accept that I get angry.
I accept that I feel sadness. I accept that I get anxious and scared.
I accept that I’m a human who experiences all sorts of emotions. Exhilaration, pride and contentment, too.
I accept all of the of the senses.
Sights…. Sounds… smells.
I accept the judgements that arise about what they offer. Nice – Not nice. Grating – Blissful. Boring – Exciting – Revolting. I accept all the descriptions that come up about my experience.
I accept others.
I recall their unique and beautiful qualities and smile.
And I try to accept their flaws. For just like them, I have flaws.
I accept my imperfections.
Our imperfections are our vulnerabilities and our vulnerabilities is what we share as humans.
My imperfections may be a work in progress. But for now, I accept them as they are.
I accept hope, joy and calm into my life.
I savour it while it is here. I let it in. I let it linger. But I don’t cling.
I let it flow through me to make room for the next new experience.
I accept this life.
Its ever-changing nature.
I accept love and loss. Happiness and heartbreak.
I accept it all.
I accept me.
Allow this feeling of acceptance to fill up your body and mind for the remainder of the meditation. If other phrases or affirmations drop into your awareness feel free to follow their lead, for it’s usually what you need most in the moment.
And just roll with the meditation as it unfolds.
